If you where mine (for Manson)

If you where mine, I'd let you kill me slowly. If you where mine, I'd bleed my blood for you. So we lay, dead in the ashes of the moon. Everythings black now. You scare me. I am afraid of you, it only makes me love you more. If you where mine, you would be my vampire. If you where mine you would drink me til the end. Til the end.... I feel it so close... so cold. My corpse is yours. Pale and cold. Scared. Here comes the moon again....again... to remind me of who you are. <3

I wish I could go away

I want to go away I dont know where just somewhere... away from my moms house.... Grr.... Im not writing anymore. Im to sad

I feel luved.

Tunes: "Pictures of You" The Cure
Mood: Sulking but happy

I have the sweetest dorkface everrrrrrrrr. :3 He's such a sweetheart. Lol. He makes me feel so loved. <3 :3 Yay! Well bed time. Margar is a sleepy one.

Tangled

Tunes: "Love Will Tear Us Apart" Joy Division
Mood: Sulking....sulking...thinking....sulking...

Bleeeeeeeeeeeeeh. I've been sulking alot latly. I guess its because I miss my boyfriend. :( I wanna hang out with him!! He's funny. <3

I keep having suicidal thoughts.... my medicine isnt working I dont think. I dont know! I keep having werid flashes that I'd be better off dead or something. :( I dont know..... I've just been sulking and thinking about it for hours and hours and hours!! Grrr I dont like my life at the moment.

Wonderwall

This was a stupid poem I wrote for my boyfriend. :3

You realize I'm in love in with in a rainbow ice cream gonna run right back to you. Lost in a wonderwall, found my self suck with you. I am a black rainbow and you fell down and I caught you. Nothing makes much sence to me it seems to be just you and me in a world full of normal people. So we sit and dream away about differnt colored songs and days. Lets climb our own wonderwall and be lazy in the middle. Right back to you I probly will fall. But after all, its okay, your my wonderwall <3

LOOK!!

LOOK! ITS THE 90s JOHN LENNON!! XD Lol. LIAM! <3

This Picture (something for him)

This picutre feels like velvet on my broken skin. This picture holds my fondest dreams. This picture takes away the pain. It makes me feel alive, when I always feel dead. This makes me need you even more. This picture made me insane and mad enough to need you. This picture brakes my heart. This picture makes me feel when I am numb. This picture makes me speak when I am dumb. This picture makes me cry. And it is all I have left. This picture is all I ever wanted, to never tear away at my periscious picture of you. <3

Love me?

Love me then?
Love me now?
Love me when?
Love me coldly?
Love me warmly?
Love me soft?
Love me in the dark?
Love me in the light?
Love me lost in midnight?
Love me in the graveyard?
Love me with thorns in my eyes?
Love me when I die?
Love me when I cry?
Love me forever?
Love me never?
Love me in pain?
Love me in rain?
Love me sadly?
Love me madly?
Love me then?
Love me now?
Love me.....still?

I lost my self, I lost my self....

Mood: Tired, pissed.
Tunes: "Karma Police" Radiohead

I cant seem to wake up!! I try really hard to get out of bed and it hurts! Am I dying? Oh I am not what I was once. I keep seeing things... not people....well I dont know. I've just been so pissed off at nothing!! Its insane.

I couldnt ever love you more

Because I love you all to much <3 :(

Wax

Waxing candle burning fast, waxing candle burt now done. Heat. Light. Engery. Touch and burn. Touch and burn. Burn burn! Life. Dancing...dancers? Wax. Hot. Warning label? Warning label. Ripped it off my pill bottle. Over does on sleeping pills...getting sleepy, getting weary. Candle keeps burning in the wind. Waxing, melting candle burning fast, waxing burt now dead. So I lay down in my death bed.

I just fail to care

Mood: Depressed.... longing.
Tunes: "Disinagration" The Cure

It seems to me that I dont care about alot of stuff anymore! I mean, I care about some people and things... but alot of stuff just dosnt make me movitivated to help with whatever the cause or problem is. I hate it when people come up to me and are like "DONT KILL YOURSELF!!" because I said I dont really care about my life. Its so annoying...grr. I fail to care and I hate the world.

How it is

Mood: longing
Tunes: "Disinagration" The Cure

I keep falling alseep and in my dreams I keep falling. Thats how it has been, and how it is. I cant focous on anything anymore. I get to lost in my own dreams that I know will never happen....never happen. But I keep believing them anyway. I hope when I reach the end of my falling... he will catch me.

I miss you

Dont tune me out! Cant you see I'm crying out for your...your...love? Love? Explain to me this pain. Cut me out of the prison of my monsters in my dreams. Can you cut away the paper wall that keeps me away from you? Can we just move on? No. Its too late, its over and your gone. But I miss you I miss you I miss you way to much. Its all a repeat. I wish you'd come and resuce me from the monsters inside my dream...but this wish was a wish to late. Can you tell that I miss you, I miss you I miss you....so much.

Run like hell.

Bodies. Fallen. Twisted. Bleeding. Screaming. No time for dreaming. We have to run. We have to run. Run run run!!

Heil Mein Führer!

Bang. Pop. Screams. MOTHER!!

Heil Mein Führer!

Twisted. Ashes. Rotting. Blurry. Sick. Snow. Snow....peacefull snow. Look at the snow it cant reject you....

Heil Mein Führer!

Chanting. Louder. Screaming. Hate.

Heil Mein Führer!

Dont look at the dead bodies...they mean nothing to you. You never had a mother. Just keep running. Soon you'll be okay... Leave that behide. Take off your shoes!

Heil Mein Führer!

No! Leave them on! Just run...thats all you know how to do. Thats all. Run. From the time you where born- ignore your screaming lover dying- see? She's gone. You never had her. Run run run.

Heil Mein Führer!

Food. I need food. No. I dont know how to eat. All I know is how to breathe, run, run, run, hide, and run. Thats all. Why is the snow red?? Oh why is the snow red near me!? Snow is white not red!

Heil Mein Führer!

NO DONT TRIP!! They got me get it over with get it over with....wait no! Run. Run Run. Dont turn around....Run run run...

Heil Mein Führer!
Run...

Heil Mein Führer!

....run...

Heil Mein Führer!

Run....run....

Heil Mein Führer!

....Run like... hell.

And so you have stolen (something for Robert Smith....)

And so you have stolen my breath, And so you make me numb. So I decied to die. Slowly at some speed. And so you I leave my heart behide for you to get. And so you leave me with empty and a prayer for more rain. Sick of it I turn away, but knowing truly that there will never be a last time I call your name...empty I feel. Empty I felt. And so you have stolen my true memories and so I happily dream of you....only to wake up alone and afraid. And so you have stolen my heart. Bleeding and broken as it doth become cold. And so you stolen my sanity, ripped it away from me. And so you stolen my heart that now beats all to slowly. <3

Cant Remember

Mood: Sleepy
Tunes: "The End Of The World" The Cure (If anyone knows what album this is on PLEASE let me know....)

My memory is going....fast. Its filling up with moments that never happend (but I wished they did
Luv Ya

Margar C XXX

Pissed off

Mood: Pissed off... just generaly pissed.
Tunes: "The End Of The World" The Cure

I want stuff to end. What? I have no idea. I've just been really pissed off at everything lately. Am I just naturaly pissed off?! Probly. Meh. I dont wanna write anymore on this.....go die.

Love you,

Margar C XXX

Only for a moment

Only for a moment can I truly live, only for a moment can I truly see. Always I have loved, but, alas! It'll go down as a useless flame. A hunderd years I have lived, a thousand breathes escaped my lips, 20,000 tears I have shead. 3000 drops of blood bleed. Golden years have come, and they have passed. A hunderd secerts shared, love given in pity. And only for a moment... only for a moment... is there time for me to hold you. One more breathe then my life will be none. One more time to hold your hand. One more time to look back before I move on. First time to truly mean "I love you". Only for a moment can I touch you? Can I cry with you? Only for a moment can I truly live.

Why do I?

Why do I feel this? A feeling they call love? Why does this feeling, shine sweeter than stars above? Why do I call you, and why do you never come? Why do I love you? Why does it hurt when I awake from my dream. Arnt I living a dream? No. Then wouldnt you come threw? How can I get to you? Why cant I be with you? Why do I wait for you everyday and yet... people tell me you are very very far away. Why cant I find you? Why do I need you? Why cant I feel you? Oh why oh why cant I tell you? Why do questions go unanswerd?

Questions

What happens when we die? Do we go away? Or do we stay and waste away?
What happens when we fall to hard? Can we get back up?
What happens when we fall in love with someone you cant see?

I'm just dreaming....

What happens YOU only have 100 years to live?

A frightening look in my mind...

I'm just going to type whatevers in my head!! Comment if you see anything interesting... (Ive always wanted to do this btw)So here we go...

Grr youtube wont load!!!!
Love Kats YAY!!!
Meeeeeeeeeeeow....hee hee
I need to learn how to play bass
bass girl needs to learn how to play this
Into the sea you and me love cats
I cant stop dancing
GUM!! I need gum!
Hee hee Robert Smiths so cute when he makes cat noises
I need new shoes
What time is it???
I'm super glad my anuts here!!
Should I listen to that song again?
Hmmmm.... I need me some Kool Aid
KOOL AID MAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!
Geez whoevers reading this must really have a long attention span
WHA!! IN BETWEEN DAYS!!! <3 <3
-shigh- I love The Cure.....i think alittle too much...wait...no. :D