Yet another letter to Oscar Wilde

Oh! Woe is I!

For I have deeply felt affections which YOU, dear Oscar might find terribly trival and strange.

A coward I am... I seal the affections kissed apon the cold Paris stones on where you now lie.

For have you not said "Every man kills the thing he loves, cowards to it with a kiss, the kindest with a knife for the death soon grow cold".

Ah! If I only had a knife.

Perhaps then and only then would I have pleased you?

As you once stated "Every MAN".

And I mearly ask you this, where doth I, where doth I, good sir, a young woman stand?

Always yours forever and ever more,

Margaret.

Logical?

Tunes: "Obsticle 1" Interpol
Mood: Meh. Depressed slightly

This is not logical

Stabbing Myself

Still....ness.
Broken. Like. A. Bride.
I can't breathe.
So. I. Go. Stabbing my self in the neck.

Stabbing. Stabbing. In. The. Neck.
I don't need a tomarrow.
I don't need a christmas.
I need. Still...ness.

I. am. MAD.
So. I'll. Stab. My. Self. In. The. Neck.
Still...ness
Still...ness

Bloodlust.
I feel it. Dripping down from me.
Dripping. From. Me.

Give me stillness.
Give me a cold friend.
I dont like life, Mom.
Go away.
Go away!!!

I. Am. MAD!!!

I...stab...my self in the neck

In the neck.

In the neck...

Stabbing. My. Self. In. The. Neck.

Its Over Now.

Lights go out
Darkness returns to the sky
Its over now.

The sun droops away and dies.
The stars come out with the sky.
The day is over now.

Band goes off.
Lights go out.
You still wait.
But you know its over now.

The lights are bright they blind my eyes.
Happiness fills me to the bone.
These people are accepting me.
The world turns its back on me, but I dont care.
I know....
The worst is over now.

The worst is over for us now.
Our life-web has been spun... we have lived our simple days.
And we're happy.
Happy.
Because... Our struggles are over now.

One day, the fighting will end. There and then I hope we can all say...
It's over now.

I should just die

Mood: Depressed... a little angery at myself.
Tunes: "New Dawn Fades" Joy Division

-sigh- I want to die. Why? I dont feel right being alive. I dont feel like I'm ment to be. I feel compeatly numb. Yea it's selfish. But I dont know!! I just dont think the world wants to here me being a whiny little bitch. I wish I could talk to Ian Curtis. Yes. I know he is dead now and has nothing to do with me but it seems like he would understand..... or maybe its because I have a strange (VERY strange) love for him. Like real love.GOD IM SO FUCKED UP!!!!! He writes about all the stuff I feel...... I get all nervous and he makes me cry. I wish he could talk to me.... hold me... -sigh- I dont know what to do. I hate the town I live in. It's nothing but a hick town. Theres nothing.... all I do is get picked on for my belifes. There is no safe place.... I'm gay-hater-meat to all of them. They wont leave me alone. I should just die.

The flowers thoughts

Flowers they sit in wilted shame of another worldy sin that I can not explain.

They gaze at the pale winter sky and remember fondly of spring....

Spring was long ago.

The leaves they have died. Much to the delight of the crows.

Vilots cry there childish weeps and woes while the farmer picks and plucks them up just so; for his new wifes bonnet.

The black roese wait for there somber end.

To have there brief moments of joy as they laugh bitterly at the lovers end; the funeral.

They laugh! Can you imagen? The white roese share there grif somberly with the preist as they watch life slip away....

How we hold hands

Mood: Depressed. Well No. Bitter sweet.
Tunes: "Wonderwall" Oasis

Ok. So I'm going to be a whiny little girl. I miss my wonderwall. :( I miss seeing him at school and and having someone to lean on in band class. I miss his messy hair and his dorkness about comic books. I even kind of miss how he made fun of me when I'd try and fix my hair (and fail at fixing btw). I miss going to the bus loop and seeing him there ignoring our redneck friends conversation about something. The thing I miss most of all is.... well. I need to explain something first. Ok so I have this black hoodie and its got thumbholes in it that I made I messed up and now theres a big hole in the wrist area of the jacket. So, he would put his hand threw the wrist hole and his thumb threw my thumb hole. Thats how we hold hands. :) I miss that alot. We did that tons of times in band class. I still see him but its not as often as before. -shigh- I loves him. :( <3

Am I really?

Mood: In need of adventure.... excitment....
Tunes: "Brick" Ben Folds Five

Ive been reading alot about my horascopes.... I wonder if there really true. Some of the stuff is acterite. But I dont know...